sometimes i can’t talk myself down from here. sometimes i keep dragging myself up the concrete steps until i get up on that ledge, blood and tears.

i stand out on the edge and i don’t know how to get off. i don’t know how to come down. and i don’t know if i’m ever going to ever hit the days where i don’t wake up every so often just to crack the mirror and throw myself over that dark line.

its the fear that pulls me up and over the side. the fear that drags me on my hands and knees up to the edge when it hits. i never expect the left hook to the face that reminds me: everything i have faith in might be a fantasy. all the things that i hold in trust could shift to salt and pour off my hands to ruin the earth. and that maybe the world just hides your latest, greatest heartbreak behind its back until the last and worst possible moment.

i want to come down. i want to get off. dear god help me come down.
dear god hold my hand.
dear god promise me this stops.

most of the time i forget where the ledge even is. and then comes the hour i’m up here, terrified that i’ll never stop climbing up, or worse, that i’ll never get down again.

“If the Supreme Court says that you have the right to consensual [gay] sex within your home, then you have the right to bigamy, you have the right to polygamy, you have the right to incest, you have the right to adultery. You have the right to anything. Does that undermine the fabric of our society? I would argue yes, it does. … That’s not to pick on homosexuality. It’s not, you know, man on child, man on dog, or whatever the case may be. It is one thing.” — Rick “Frothy” Santorum, April 7, 2003

during this whole presidential campaign i have felt like David After Dentist. “is this real life?” … “why is this happening to me? is this going to be forever??” and then standing up in my carseat and screaming in a rage until i pass out.

(Source: theweek.com)